And tried to focus. With some semblance of success. Presents were completed, wrapped, presented, and opened. I’m still recovering from the flurry of activity.
I spent some time being present. With family and friends. And more family. I really did enjoy some time being somewhat unplugged. I am thankful to those friends I got to spend a few moments catching up with. And thank you for commenting on my blog. I really appreciate it. I also appreciate knowing that I am not alone in my own manic life sometimes… and that we all struggle with similar things.
And now, I am forgiving myself. For not living up to my blogging every day this month. I am trying to be okay with not living up to some expectations I projected on myself.
I have been reminded several times recently that whenever I feel like I am getting some things off of my “list” (and I will expand more on that list in a moment), that I rapidly add at least one or two or ten more things onto that list. Boy, am I ever worried about never being bored. Ha! My list contains a number of “projects” – between finishing block exchange quilts, finishing projects I have decided I must do for friends and family, and other things I want to do for myself. I have not physically written that list for a long time. I have not included such things on the list like clothes I would like to make for myself.
Nor do I include the brilliant idea I had this summer of doing pickled carrots for everyone this year for christmas. Now, that would have been great. Garden got in a bit late. Planted a TON of carrots. They came up late. Was not a hot summer, so really, did not grow very well, but still had an admirable crop. The slugs were the absolute worst this year. Like I swear, if prairie escargot was a thing – I could have served it 10 times a day and still not made a dent in the slimy invasion. I did go out and salt the slugs one day. I was deriving great pleasure from their demise. Not the best solution, but a small victory. And, the dill I planted for such wonderful pickles? The slugs ate them. All of it. It was sooo gross.
So.. that “project” was not on the list. Guess I should put those things on the list, and then consciously decide that some things are not possible. Or, just cry uncle. I know when I am not going to meet a deadline, and learn to cut my losses as to what is not possible when time is running out. To top it all off, I am either adding too many things to the list that are not even possible of achieving, or enjoying procrastination way too much. Am I scared of not having enough to do? Not sure. Maybe it is all about my life’s purpose. Either way – I am obviously weighing myself down with unfeasible expectations.
So…. Instead of doing anything that serves as productive tonight, treated myself to watching not one but two episodes of “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”. I am loving the show. And, tomorrow, maybe I will figure out more to do with …. the list.
Wishing you a good Sunday sleep…..